Old Habits

June 18, 2025

This evening I walked with a couple of First Tee kids as they played the six hole par 3 course at Birdwood. One of the kids, a rising fifth grader, said he had played in a tournament last week. I reflexively asked, “How did you do?”

Old habit — focus on the result and not the experience.

It’s obvious that at some point in our lives there are areas where focusing on the result is important. Expected. But for a fifth grader who is learning the game of golf, I know now, thanks to working with First Tee, a better initial question is something like, where was the tournament? Or did you have fun? Or what was that like? Or even just tell me about it. The kid’s score doesn’t really matter!

As much as I hope I can help the kids learn about golf — the swing, the rules, the etiquette, the strategy, dealing with frustrations — I am indebted to how much they help me become better person. The 90 minutes I spend each week walking the course with them seems like 90 seconds. It’s Zen. It’s beyond rewarding.

By the way, I was impressed by the young man’s answer to my “incorrect” question. He said he came in last place. But I could tell by the way he said it that it didn’t bother him, didn’t change his passion for getting better. He was a duck. How awesome is that?!